NY Resolutions

It's 11:17 in the morning. I don't need to hurry. My cat stretches in bed and looks at me sidewise, blinking slowly. Can I stay in bed a bit longer? Will I miss out on all that alpine beauty if I linger till early afternoon? Or is it ok to take it slow? After all, I am on vacation.

I like the period leading up to Christmas. It creates a magical atmosphere that gradually builds up as Christmas approaches. I cherish the 'legal' lazy time, enjoying the opportunity to slow down. I relish going away with my cat and having all this time to just reflect on the year coming to its beautiful end in a special place.

I acknowledge that I'm fortunate to have the life that I do. I am grateful for the opportunitis to travel, for my incredible cat who has proven to be the best travel companion, and for the chance to participate in musical events and learn the art of being a musician. here are so many things to be thankful for. However, there are also thoughts and feelings I can no longer ignore. They manifest themselves in the form of depression, and instead of evading them, I understand that I should embrace them.

I sense that many of my professional duties do not align with my true self. There seems to be more to life, more to work than what I am currently engaged in.

It's peculiar. I teach languages, a pursuit I had always desired. Yet, on certain days, the task of getting out of bed becomes a struggle. There are mornings when I wake up and find myself Googling for news of a transport strike or a natural disaster in my area, secretly hoping it might provide an excuse to stay home.

I don't sense that my current job, working for educational institutions and adhering to the traditional teaching methods, or dealing with unmotivated students, allows me to reach my full potential. I yearn for more— a fusion of language, culture, music, photography, videography, traveling, writing, and discovery. I crave innovative approaches, new formats of teaching. I aspire to think more courageously and experiment more freely.

I'm done being afraid.

That is my 2024 New Year resolution.